You Kids Wanna See A Dead Body?

BOO! Thats as close to a Halloween-themed greeting you people get this month.

I'm tired, bored and annoyed I'm listening to a section of tubas outside the band office here in the stadium as they attempt (and fail) to keep a steady rhythm during a rousing rendition of 'Wooley Bully'.

Nothing much is new with me, the new house is still sweet, I've successfully avoided Taco Bell for over a year, and the Vanders and I got a cat. Alert the presses! Sarcastic or not, thats pretty much been the highlight of the past thirty days. If thats any indication of how the next two months are going to be, fetch me some vicodin henceforth so I can finish out the year in peace!!!!

Onward Christian Soldiers, to the main rant of October:

"People are going to get fatter."

I saw this headline on the Yahoo front page about a week back. Grim news, eh? Who really cares, the biggest reaction however will of course be the fact that when people ARE fatter, all the people who had been morbidly obese since day one will take to the streets, 'raising the roof' as it were, catcalling and taunting the newcomers to their fraternity saying "Yo, I wuz fat before it was cool to be fat! You guyz are sellouts!". To which the people who recently retained their Jolly-esque phisique will retaliate with a bearhug of nuclear arms...Iraq isn't the problem people, the future fat people are! The only solution is to kill all the children of the world now, before it's too late! Ok so that might be a little extensive...but it's something Nostradamus has warned us about : "Bewhere the festively plump, for they shall demolish the earth." I forget exactly where I read that but I'm pretty sure it's true docerine since you have to believe anything written on a book of old scrolls.

Just thought that headline was mildly humerous.

Something else thats mildly humerous: the harder the girls at Hooters try to pimp me for tips, the less they get...Mwhahahahahahahahah!!1!1!!1!

Before I end I gotsta say, I finally did sing karaoke. I won't tell you which category I fit into from my newsletter on the subject though...you might just have to hang out with us sometime to find out firsthand...

This is Zach, as always saying "Don't add me to your block list."

(Oh and don't trust any six foot tall "kid's" wearing nothing but their underwear on their head on Halloween. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me...but fool me a third time, you get an aluminum baseball bat to add to your attire, freak!)

*****Congratulations to Glen and Christi on the birth of their baby!*****